Sunday, July 31, 2005
I'm fascinated by how screwed up messages can get between people. What an enormous amount of heartache it causes, especially for those with strong empathy. No surprise that some people opt out of society completely. On one level, yes, we're all social animals - but on another we're all spiritual beings in human form. If you're living at the spiritual level much of the time, the temptation to stay there and not deal with the world is great.
For me, though, somehow running off into eternal bliss seems a bit selfish. Gotta do what I can while I'm here.
Technorati tags: miscommunication dropout
Friday, July 29, 2005
When I picked up the message later, I listened for the pause....and there wasn't one! No noticeable difference in tempo. I am *amazed*. I had no idea that there might be such a huge difference between my experience of speech and the actual sound of what I say.
Now that I know, what to do? How many conversations have been warped by this? Hundreds? Thousands? Am I not leaving any space for other people to follow me when I change track? This is wild. I want to think about it for a few days, then start experimenting! Watch this space.
Technorati tags: voicemail sensory interruption
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Let me know what you think.
Anyway it's yet another gorgeous day here in Vancouver and I'm working, working, working - and I'm happy, happy, happy. Strange how I don't mind (quite so much) doing really dull tasks like writing letters and bookkeeping when it's in service of The Vision.
Musing today about offering services to companies with gifted employee problems. Don't know how that might look, but I'm sure educating the company on what the "problem" is would be heavily involved. The whole thing is so much bigger than just the gifted employee and their behaviour. They are the Identified Patient, kicking against the system - just like family counselling!
Technorati tags: gifted employees published
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
What is this crazy drive to fit in? It must have roots in survival - whenever one is helpless (infancy, illness, inebriation for example) the social group is the safety net. We don't want to stick out, because that might mean we're intruders. How can we expand the definition of society? Is it biological destiny, which must be educated out of every one of us?
Technorati tags: gifted isolation
Monday, July 25, 2005
I was also really struck by the language on the websites of the private schools. Some parts of it are very coach-like, not surprisingly. The emphasis on individual growth seems so wierd when juxtaposed with various versions of "school spirit". From my experience at school and at work, it is dangerous to believe what an organization says about itself is a true reflection of its day-to-day reality for employees/students. Coming closer to the ideals of the organization is vital for sustainable growth. Hopefully things have changed.
Technorati tags: gifted school
Sunday, July 24, 2005
A fear revisited
I don't think of myself as a timid person, and doubt that I would be characterized as such by anyone who knows me. Yet I still have so many ghosts! I pluck them out one by one, hold them up to the light, and see the spark of wisdom they offer. Thanking them, I lay them aside, for there is much to do before I have time to listen to their circular ramblings again.
Technorati tags: shadow belief Goethe
Friday, July 22, 2005
Good thing I've got such awesome support from Wonderbro, my boyfriend, my Buddy, and my friends. The other surprising support is the Canadian government, who have this awesome program that teaches you about business and then gives you living expenses (very low standard of living, but living) while you concentrate on getting your business going. You can read all about all the wonderful programs offered in BC at http://www.smallbusinessbc.ca/pdf/overview.pdf. We all have our challenges but this list convinces me that some of the bureaucrats have their heart in the right place.
Technorati tags: entrepreneur sales
Thursday, July 21, 2005
Seducing the Google Bots
There's so much to see on the internet, it's not surprising that the bots get tired and need ever more enticements to visit. Wonderbro assures me that they will get to me in about a week.
Wrote a sales letter today and got sidetracked when looking for a good quote on the Davidson Institute site http://www.ditd.org/public/. There's really some great people working in this field and it is fantastic to know that there are people as passionate as I am about meeting the needs of gifted people http://www.gt-cybersource.org/Record.aspx?NavID=2_0&rid=12366.
There's hope, and I'm not alone - and it's my mission to let all gifted people know that.
Technorati tags: gifted community
Wednesday, July 20, 2005
He said I should let you, dear reader, know that you have the option to post comments anonymously. I would love to hear from you. Yes, you. What do you notice? What causes veins to pop out in your neck? Do you have any questions?
Technorati tags: WonderBro anonymity
Accountability and choice
Using today's anxiety about business being slow as fuel. I've found that nothing motivates me more than not having enough to do. I could be actively worrying about becoming a bag lady, or creating a fight with my boyfriend, or any other non-optimal situation, but I choose instead to use all that energy to solve a problem or get through a complicated but boring chore (like setting up a contact database and learning how to add metas to my website). Having been told so often that "it's just the way you are", I feel very smug knowing it's not true. I can choose my reaction! Yay!
Technorati tags: anxiety behavioural modification
Tuesday, July 19, 2005
Getting it together
I am pissed off that the majority of the pop-psych and even academic psych literature out there does not even recognize some of the things that are part of my deep truth. I am upset by the prejudice against the possibility of high IQ people needing help or being disadvantaged. And the requirement for gifted people to fit into society's pre-determined patterns to be valued actually makes me nauseous. For a really good exposition of what giftedness can do to a life, and how society can destroy it, check out the fantastic animated short "Ryan".
I wish for a way to show up in this social world that is acceptable even if it is strange. I think it's desperately unfair that fitting in comes so naturally to others. Is it surprising that I find social situations exhausting? It's like playing chess on 20 different boards.
Anyway, I'm continuing to work where I can, and I'm taking it out on the elliptical trainer at the gym, and kneading pizza dough with a vengeance. At the very least this rage will be productive.
Technorati tags: gifted Ryan
Sunday, July 17, 2005
Sunday and EQ
I'm pretty sure it's got something to do with his attitude that high IQ is largely independent of high EQ, but EQ is a better predictor of success in our society. I think it's the idea that a normative set of emotional skills are "better". Anyway at least it's fuel for the article mill, and gives me an excuse to revisit the awesome Rodin exhibit at the VAG. The Balzac series is cool.
Technorati tags: EQ Rodin
Saturday, July 16, 2005
As GBS said, "Indifference is the essence of inhumanity." Perhaps society simply can't accept that people are different. That would fit with the reduction of benefits for the mentally disabled. To me, being fair and treating everyone equally are not the same thing.
What can I do? Write, blog, complain, speak up, speak out, do my work, run my business, be myself. Respond reasonably to the same criticisms over and over again, and not lose faith that my perceptions are valuable and necessary. Remember all the kids who don't think they have a right to a voice, and all the adults who are playing the game because that's the only way they know how to survive in this society. And keep on showing up.
Technorati tags: depression high IQ
Friday, July 15, 2005
We quickly formed a connection based on the fact that Dewey (yes, he has a name) is such a great listener. In fact he will repeat my words for me verbatim at the touch of a button. We had such laughs over his variety of humorous ring-tones, his version of "Mr. Roboto" bringing tears of joy. He never fails to give me my messages, he remembers the names of all my friends, and he always apologizes if he can't give me service.
Yes, I'm in love with my cell phone, and we're joined at the hip. I gush embarrassingly about his great qualities to anyone who will listen. This means you!
Technorati tags: cell phone
Thursday, July 14, 2005
I can't imagine that my insane meanderings through the world will be of interest to anyone but me. I love my life and I think that anything that keeps me more concious is useful. This is also the argument I use to justify daily reading of my horoscope in two different newspapers.
So let's just go for it and see what happens. I'm starting my own business right now and I'm excited, but scared. Once, my dad was giving me a driving lesson and we stopped at a gas station and filled up, oil, etc. About 10 minutes later the oil light comes on, Dad's a bit confused and asks me to pull over. He opens the hood and there's oil everywhere. He proceeds to yell and stuff for a while and imply that I'm an idiot because I didn't put the oil cap back on. Well, if I'd have known it was that important I would have! No-one explained it to me! I had no idea how the thing worked!
So with starting this business, I'm learning all I can, but I know that somehow I'm going to leave the oil cap off.
Technorati tags: newbie oil cap